Resilience – 3 things everybody should know!
How resilience works for me.
I’m feeling on edge right now! It’s due to a combination of things, but I’m not sure what.
One might be that I feel exposed, unsure because I’m exploring new things and sometimes I feel like I really don’t know what I’m doing.
Another could be that I feel as though I’ve put in an enormous effort, but the results I’ve achieved so far don’t seem to be worth the effort invested.
I realise that repeating the same thing over and over and expecting to achieve a different outcome is neither constructive nor productive. Therefore, I became aware that I needed to change my strategy!
I know that I need to keep my spirits up and remain positive, but the negative voice in my head can sometimes have a different agenda!
I don’t always find it easy to cope with my negative emotions. Other people seem to happily sail along without upset, but my journey has been a bit bumpy. So, I got to thinking, what did they do that I didn’t?
Thankfully I’ve caught up! I’ve learned a few coping techniques over the years, which I now use to keep me sane! They may not keep my dark moments at bay completely, but they do help.
I’ve discovered that it’s not at all easy to keep positive when everything around me is falling apart, or at least that’s how it feels to me during those moments! Obviously, that’s not the case, everything didn’t collapse, I’m here writing this after all!
So, I’ve come to learn about resilience, what it is, why it’s essential, and how I can get more of it!
Resilience seems to me to be made up of a combination of things.
Keeping the light on!
The first thing that strikes me is that resilience is about not giving up. In other words, persevering no matter what! I have found this hard to do, especially when the light has gone out and the darkness has descended. But I’ve learned that I must keep going because the alternatives are worse – the feelings of failure, unhappiness, and regret.
I now know that resilience is partly about the fight, about taking the hits, about being knocked down, and about having the strength and courage to get back up into the firing line. I realise that some days I don’t have the energy or the motivation because I’m emotionally and physically exhausted. Which leads me to my next discovery.
Fatigue makes cowards of us all!
The second thing I’ve realised is that fatigue undermines resilience! I’ve learned that the darkness is much more likely to flood over me when I’m tired. Destructive thoughts like, “I’m not good enough”, “I’ll never make it”, “what’s the point” invade and take over my mind much more when I’ve run out of juice. So, I’ve learned the hard way that resilience is also about knowing when to stop and get some rest.
Fight as if your life depends on it!
The third thing I’ve discovered is that high self-confidence and self-belief fuel resilience! During the dark moments, they’re nowhere to be seen or heard, they’re badly beaten, and bruised, and pushed to the back of the mind leaving self-doubt firmly in charge. So, I’ve learned how important it is to protect my confidence and my beliefs and guard them against my own destructive thoughts.
I now know that holding onto a glimmer of hope is my way back to happier days. It’s the “ace up my sleeve” that I use to defeat the enemy and claw myself back into the light!
If you’ve experienced the same, then you’ll understand the importance of what I’m going to say next – I wish I had been taught how to build up my resilience as a kid!
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